Harper is a pimp. What else can be said?

Without Harper, there would only be gray.
Dull, redundant, no night and no day.
He sparks and sputters like a flaming fire.
Gleaming and shining like a towering spire.
Erect and kempt, honest and virile.
Let's just hope for our sakes he's sterile.

'cept for the Kango hat, this Harper is one cool dude.
Top 5 Kennedy's Clientele list 6 years strong.

Harper's my tribester. He's almost the youngest dirty old man I know. He's cool.